So the other day, I was asked, can you get Ibuprofen for me?

I said yes.

But really, I don't want to.

Good thing later on, he said, oh I still have some.

I didn't want to because it's not mine, I don't want to take it.

I said yes because he needs it.

And for smoother interpersonal relations.


So anyway, I'm thinking of deactivating my facebook again.
The thought got further strengthened when I read they're going to force me to use timeline.

I hate it.

Facebook is too meddlesome. Have you ever heard of inertia? I'm not going to move unless a force acts on me. So I'm not moving. Can you do anything? You're not supposed to, but your doing timeline. Leave me alone.

I just need facebook to communicate.

Of course, in my advantage.

So why am I keeping it open?

It's like a bargaining tool. If I close it, then they would think, aha, hmm... ok, I've got you

No need to further get you because I've got you

I have no skills in playing hard to get... I do it and then I overdo it

So I'm telling, one exit strategy is to take that loan...

All I need to do is pass the exam.

And the other me is telling, no, you're going to make a mistake, what if you're better off here than there

You might have a future here

Where else do you encounter a new place opening?

It's like one of those new accounts opening in a call center, the first hires get the boss positions.

So middle me is saying now, Ok, this is just Plan B, gotta have a plan i case something goes wrong.

Well, if I continue to save, within 3 years, I don't need to take a loan.

But I heard it, forget about it.

So anyway, there's a lot of arguments going on, like many me all talking, like one is saying, oh I'm going there because there, I can marry. Here, you get jail. Another me is saying, are you stupid, this is like chance of a lifetime. Another's saying, nope, you're just imagining things. Looping... like on and on, it repeats.

So like, in the end, the question is about happiness.

I would be happy there because I looked at the HP website, and the prices and the one that I want, it's there, I can order it, I'm at the cutting edge of whatever consumer technology I can buy. I looked at other countries, and it's not the same...

I could buy parts and install it easily, here I can't do that.

But now, I am thinking, well, you could always go there to visit. Doesn't have to be you live there.

Omg, it's like, if I'm to complain like this forever, it's going to be a headache. There's no fun, no happiness in this.

I could not eat, I did it, but when I felt hungry, that's when the thoughts come in, I'm asking, why

And then when it's time to eat, no appetite

...

So uh, what will family say? Yeah, as a natural reaction, they will ask, why... it's not going to be smooth, it's not going to be like, oh, ok, you did that, you're a grown-up, you decided for yourself. That was my idea, I told them that, I think they might use it when they discover, but really, if  I move, it will elicit a reaction from them. Up to what degree, I don't know.

I mean, it's not realistic that they won't make an issue out of it, of course it will be an issue.

hmm so facebook again, I think it has something to do with that Dream Act, that's why I was contacted.

I should've just not followed the rules!